


you were the one all along

by sparklypoms



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Break Up, Everyone Needs A Hug, Flirting, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Past Ryan Bergara/Helen Pan, Pining, Pining Shane Madej, Ryan is a little baby that has to be cherished at all times, Slightly Dark! Helen Pan, Suicide Attempt, Unhealthy Relationships, i swear none of this is real and helen isnt evil, shyan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-28
Updated: 2019-05-28
Packaged: 2020-03-07 06:55:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18868054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sparklypoms/pseuds/sparklypoms
Summary: helen breaks up with ryan while shane watches the man he loves spiral downwards into a pit of low self esteem, depression, and ending up in an overall not-ryan-like state.good thing he's always there to pull ryan out.whether ryan wants it or not.oh and by the way, there's angst.





	you were the one all along

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: I am in no way saying that i wishharm on helen and ryan's relationship nor shane and sara's, nor am i saying that helen is dark or evil or whatever or that we should send hate to her or something. this is entirely fiction and i have no intention to mock or discredit both their relationships and i respect (and would die for) all of them very much. :)))
> 
> also if you liked the story, please comment or leave some kudos if you want to :)

Ryan was an anxious little prick who loves the supernatural.

That’s it.

That was Ryan.

Shane is a creepy little asshole who loves taunting Ryan.

And so, those two became Buzzfeed Unsolved.

And as time stretched, they got closer.

Close enough for Shane to feel something.

But that couldn’t be it.

And even if it was, it didn’t matter.

Because Ryan was taken.

Ryan Bergara was dating Helen Pan.

And they were in a five-year relationship.

Longer than Unsolved.

Longer than their friendship.

Shane slammed the coffee mug on his desk as quietly as he could.

Ryan arrived a few moments later, bathed in sweat as his joggers brushed up against his open thighs.

Oh my god.

_He was fucked today._

So, don’t blame him when his palms got sweaty in the middle of work and he spilt coffee all over his shirt.

Don’t blame him when Ryan turned around with that smile- _oh god_ \- and lent him one of his hoodies.

Don’t blame him when he secretly sniffed Ryan’s hoodie, inhaling his scent, knowing that Ryan could never be his.

 

When Ryan and Helen broke up, Shane couldn’t decide whether he was happy or not.

Ryan, on the other hand, was an utter and literal mess.

He didn’t come to work that often.

He flirted with girls all around the office.

Including Kelsey while they were shooting an episode with her.

They cut that part out, of course.

But still, Shane couldn’t handle it.

He still loved Ryan.

And so, as each day dragged on, as each day the reality of Ryan being _freely_ available to _anyone_ who fell in love with him, and he loved back, hit Shane.

He was never going to be with Ryan.

And he needed to shove those feelings down like a man and help his friend move on from his ex.

His _friend._

 

 

Ryan was a literal mess.

So he did what he did best.

Get drunk and forget everything.

Maye flirt with some girls while he was at it.

Because he would do anything to fill the gap that Helen had left in his heart.

Or maybe his heart should just stop beating, you know?

That would be the best situation.

Oh my god, that would be fantastic, wouldn’t it?

But what about Unsolved?

Of course, his conscious. _Ugh._

Unsolved can survive with Shane. They preferred him more, anyways.

Downing the bottle of whiskey, his throat burning, he slammed his body onto his blanket.

He would figure it out the next day.

He always did, anyway.

 

Shane watched Ryan slowly spiral downwards, and he couldn’t do anything to help him.

He tried, at least.

Ryan was flirting with girls left and right, drinking every night and wasn’t Ryan anymore.

Even his passion for Unsolved, his baby, had diminished.

It seemed that the viewers had noticed that too as the comments rushed in, concerned for Ryan’s wellbeing.

 

And Ryan couldn’t find in funnier.

How pathetic of him.

To think that they actually cared.

They didn’t care for him, just the views.

And Shane.

Shane just wanted his job.

He bet he didn’t even want to be stuck with Ryan for Unsolved, some guy, some loser who drinks and flirts because he can’t cope with the breakup of his girlfriend- _goddammit._

So, when Ryan quit Unsolved and replaced himself with Brent, he was truly surprised when Shane started to tear up.

“Ryan, _why?”_

“It’s for the best, Shane. Brent is a Shaniac, he’s a way better fit for the show, and besides, he’s been at Buzzfeed longer. He’s better for you, Shane.”

Shane just shook his head.

“ _He’s better for Unsolved.”_

 

And you can bet Shane cried hard, real hard when Brent and Ryan switched seats in the office.

Shane loved Ryan.

And Ryan just walked away.

Because the one person that Ryan loved didn’t love him back.

And the one person that did love Ryan?

Well, Ryan didn’t love him.

 

 

 

 

 

Ryan’s mental and physical health deteriorated over the one month that he and Brent had switched places.

The viewers were in confusion, asking for Ryan to return.

But he knew it would just be a matter of time before they forgot all about him.

Just like Helen.

Helen, who had found a new lover in the span _of four weeks that they broke up-_

_Coupled with the fact that she lowered his self esteem to the goddamn pits-_

_Deep breaths, Ryan._

He looked up from his coffee which had long gone cold, staring right at the window in front of him.

It was a good thirty levels high.

The impact from that would kill a human instantly.

Looking down at his mug, seeing his reflection in the brown liquid, he took a sip, and headed to his desk.

 

 

Shane’s passion and joy for Unsolved diminished over the one month that Ryan and Brent switched places.

Brent was a great guy, for sure.

But it wasn’t the same without Ryan.

Without the occasional squeals that he would let out while they were filming Supernatural.

Those late-night sleepovers where they had pulled an all-nighter together in fear of missing a deadline.

Without Ryan, frankly, Unsolved was no fun.

But most of all, he was worried for Ryan.

Ryan really wasn’t Ryan anymore.

He had stopped going to the gym.

He quit Unsolved.

He donated half of his jerseys- _Shane really couldn’t believe that._

 

And Shane wasn’t a man who believed in most things, he was a skeptic by nature, but he really couldn’t believe it when he found Ryan about to jump off a roof on the top floor of the Buzzfeed building.

 

“Oh, hey Shane.”

“Ryan,” his voice quivering, “You should get down from there.”

“Why?”

“It’s a _roof_ , Ryan! I-”

“Not like it matters, though.”

“Ryan, please.”

He turned around, once bright eyes had turned dull.

“You know, Shane, it’s funny.”

“Ryan-”

“All this time, I was crying over the one I loved. The one who left me.”

Tears silently streaming down both their faces.

“But I was blind to see that the one I loved had never left my side.”

“Ryan, you’re making no fucking sense- just get down, please and-”

_“It’s you, Shane.”_

There was a beat of silence.

Ryan turned around.

Shane reached out his hand with a cry.

And he jumped.

 

Ryan took a step forward, feeling nothing underneath him.

He let go.

And for a split second, he felt free.

Or maybe that was just because he was, well, free falling.

But he knew that soon, it’d be over.

He’d be gone.

And maybe everyone would just forget about him.

Until he felt two lanky arms wrapping around his naval and slamming his back onto the side of the building.

His back ached, but his heart was worse.

_Why couldn’t he just die in peace, alone?_

He was hauled up by the hands, forcefully clutching onto his stomach, before finally being dragged to the roof, where the person was panting, clutching Ryan’s wrist like his life depended on it.

He looked up to find a tear-stained Shane, panting and looking absolutely horrendous.

_Fake. All of it was fake._

He swiveled his body, ignoring the pain in his back as he tried to make a run for the edge again.

He needed to die. He had to be gone. He was a menace to the world. An absolute pain in the ass that needed to _just die-_

Shane then twisted his body, angling himself to grab onto Ryan’s leg, tripping him and catching him.

Pulling Ryan closer to his chest while the shorter man struggled, Shane began to cry.

Ryan didn’t believe any of it, because it _was fake, it was all fake. Shane was doing it for the views, Shane was doing it for the money, Shane was just using him like Helen did-_

“Ryan, please stop.”

He finally looked up.

“It’s real. I do love you. I _do_ love you and it’s _not fake-_ _so why_ do you keep telling yourself _these goddamn lies!”_

“Shane-”

“No, Ryan! God! Just fucking listen to me for once in your entire life!

Get it in your head that _you deserved to be loved!_ Is it that hard? _You deserved to be loved!_ And _I love you!_ Whether you feel the same or not doesn’t matter but you need to know _that- that_ there’s someone out there that isn’t just going to use you again and again and agai-!”

He was cut off by the soft pressing of lips onto his.

_Whoah._

_Wow, that felt good._

And in that moment, he knew Ryan was okay.

Maybe not fully okay, but at least he had someone.

Ryan was like a shattered mirror.

And Shane would pick up the pieces and stick them back together.

Not matter how long it took.

Because he had Ryan, and Ryan had him.

And they were what each other was waiting for all along.


End file.
